When your greatest sadness opens the door for your greatest joy

All I ever wanted was to be the perfect wife and mother…..I have never been either. If you don’t know my background, I was never able to carry a baby past the first trimester and I clearly SUCK at being a wife. I have been angry, I have grieved, I’ve dealt with harsh judgement and criticism…but none of that brought me a child or made me the perfect wife.

Now I’m here, in what a friend called the last trimester of my life. No husband, no children or grandchildren, not even a boyfriend,  just a dog who clearly thinks I’m perfect. Sometimes I’m still sad, and yes, I do get lonely.

But….if I had those joys, which are also responsibilities, I would not have been in the position to take this amazing journey I’ve started.

The Wild Goose Festival is 11 days away, I will be heading to Hot Springs next Sunday. This festival literally changed my life….I met my people. Now on the inside looking out, it’s overwhelming to see the impact it has on so many.

**To those who have never really found the thing in their life that defined them….keep looking!

**To those who are harshly judging my path, I pray you can turn it loose and find peace.

**To those who just don’t understand,  it’s okay, and it would be nice if you choose to love me anyway.

**To those who are searching, I’m always available to chat. I don’t have answers but I’m a good listener.

There’s one thing you must be ready for…..when you take a strong stand, many will turn their backs on you. It will likely be friends and family you thought would always accept you. They may even view you as an enemy. IT IS NOT EASY!!! But what I am doing is right and good and I will follow this path wherever it takes me, for as long as it lasts.

I am, by nature, a pleaser, so it is with a heavy heart that I have come to the point where I must say…..I can no longer smooth over and dress up my beliefs in an effort to make you comfortable. I am all in, and it’s up to you to decide whether to support me or reject me. But know this, I will always love you, even if we don’t agree on anything.